Friday, March 27, 2009

Pedestrian Concerns

Stop Sign This message is unmistakable, isn't it? Even in Russia, it is unmistakable.

File:Russian-STOP-KONTROL.gif

Except in Russia it means STOP AND GET OUT YOUR IDENTIFYING PAPERS, COMRADE, BECAUSE FRANKLY YOU LOOK A LITTLE SUSPICIOUS! GET YOUR HAIR CUT!

Sometimes a traffic sign tries to explain too much.


This one tells you which way to go and also the existential ramifications of Chekhov's Uncle Vanya.

In France, of course, they like to use their own word, and they get to pay someone to put that little squiggly mark above the "e." Fine. Although to an English speaker, it suggests STOP OR YOU WILL BE ARRESTED. This we can relate to.



I also don't have a problem with Walk and Don't Walk. Again they make sense. I grew up with them.

Walk Crossing Signal

Flashing Don't Walk Signal

Even the little guy walking makes sense.

Did someone get embarrassed by the low-tech image of this guy? Did someone finally heave a big sigh and say good grief, this image is right out of Pong, people. Space Invaders, for god's sake. What kind of message do we want to send to the world? Is THAT why everything is switched now to The Hand?

Sorry, but I'm not on board with that. Since when did a hand come to mean STOP?

Don't Walk Crossing Signal Even if it is in red, a hand to me means HI! COME ON OVER! GREAT TO SEE YOU! DON'T WORRY ABOUT CARS!

LIVE LONG AND PROSPER!

By the way, dear reader, though I am no Star Trek fan [can't watch characters with giant stitched up furrows in their foreheads--it gives me a headache and makes me want to check in the mirror to see how my own furrows are doing], my own hand since October 2 of last year, resembles Mr. Spock's. I haven't tried killing anybody yet with the Vulcan Neck Touch, but the day is young.





See that? My ring finger is wonky and hangs to the side. I will always now show solidarity with Spock, one I never loved, but oh well.



And so why not other Hand signals?






Come on, come on. You know you want to. Cross the street, you dmfk.






HEY BABY! WALK OVER HERE! I'M LIKIN' WHAT I SEE!





CAUTION! DON'T ASK WHAT I CAN DO WITH THIS FINGER!



GRRRR! DON'T WALK! GO HOME AND CLOSE THE DOOR AND READ A BOOK, YOU SORRYASS JAYWALKER!
Friday Zest, dear reader--enjoy!
love,
becky
http://www.statcounter.com/

5 Comments:

At 2:43 PM , Blogger Kristina said...

Oh goodness! Does your Spock finger interfere with typing? I'd hate to think of your blogging slowing down...

How about the peace sign? which, as I understand if you turn it so the back of your hand faces out, is terribly offensive in many countries of the world...

 
At 2:07 AM , Blogger sandman1 said...

Nifty! You could make up fun stories about it -- like you could tell people that the commies broke it while interrogating you but you never broke! Or that it happened one time when you were hustling rubes at a bowling alley in Jersey. Or that you caught it on the nose ring of a bull in Pamplona.

 
At 7:26 AM , Blogger Becky Motew said...

sm, Are there rubes in Jersey? I like the Pamplona bull. I'll take that.
:)

Kris, The peace sign is just a "V", isn't it? Typing unaffected, thank god. thanks for your concern.

b

 
At 12:57 AM , Blogger sandman1 said...

Surely there are rubes everywhere, but hustling seems like a Jersey sort of thing to me for some reason -- I don't know why really. The only bowling hustling I've ever heard of was in that movie King Pin, and I think that was set in the midwest or something.

It's unfair of me to slander New Jersey, but I suppose one reason I do it is because mostly I just drive through that state and pay toll after toll...

 
At 7:24 PM , Blogger Kay said...

I am liking this. Your interpretations are hilarious. We have red and green little walking men and no words ... plus buzzers that beep beep beep for those with hearing impediments.
I'm not a Star Trek fan either - the jumpsuits! The serious faces! The hair! The claustrophobia and green blood ... at least I seem to remember green blood ...
(And guess what my word verification says? COISMIC! How funny. How apt.)

 

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