Back to Reality

Here you can see some of the Japanese media sucking up to Dice K as he packs his gear to go home.
"Hey Dice! What are you hiding there in your hand? Is it your glasses?"
"Yeah, man! We thought the umpires were supposed to be blind! Funny, huh, hey Dice?"
Groveling is the same in any language.

So meanwhile, I have to get back to serious fashion accumulation before my trip to Paris. Trouble is, everything is 1) Stone Ugly or 2)Ridiculously Expensive or 3)Plain Stupid.
Here is a 2/3 combo from DKNY


Sleeveless? In winter? Let's call this the Hypothermia Special and at $345 you can really prove your brainlessness. Also, I probably don't have time to lose 70 pounds by December.

This one is very cute but is a clear #2 (Ridiculously Expensive):


It seems almost affordable at $175, but come on. The skirts always look normal length in the photographs and then when they arrive at your house, they are micro-mini. Uh, I don't think so. Still, this one is very cute, I must say.

This is cute, but a semi-Hypothermia item and I don't like the cutesie little gathers. I don't do gathers. It's a reasonable 32.95 from J. Jill, where I never have any luck. Their clothes are all for soccer moms who drive huge SUVs and want their pre-schoolers to learn French. Maybe I should hang out with them.

Talbot's just plain annoys me. HEY! WANNA PAY TWO HUNDRED BUCKS FOR A PLAIN PAIR OF BLACK PANTS? COME ON DOWN! This brown poncho-ish belted jacket with the bat wings is kind of cute, but on me it would have odd bulges that you wouldn't want to see, trust me.

Here's a cute Hypothermia-Anorexia dress from my main girlfriend, Liz Claiborne:

Only $129. We're getting into my range slowly. Not there yet, though. Let's try TJMaxx.
They make you put in your zip code and this is what it just said back to me:
There are no additional events in your area at this time. Please check back, as events are updated weekly.
Okay then, let's really dream and try Nordstrom's. What are they hawking this week?

What about these little booties/cuties guaranteed to send me straight down on the sidewalk again and break more of my elbows. Oh wait. I only have two. Guess how much these cost? Okay, I'll tell you. 465 clams. Come on, come on. Get up. Don't faint.

See now, I'm losing the will to live. I can never shop for very long. But I just found these on American Apparel, a lower priced outlet and can I believe my eyes?



Aren't these, well, tube socks? The kind your ten-year-old brother wore in 1970 when he was annoying the shit out of you and sticking gum in your hair?
I dunno, dear reader. What are they all thinking?
Je suis confusee.
A bientot
love,becky